Vicodin Induced Brilliance
I had oral surgery yesterday to install an implant post for my right bicuspid. Right away I OD'd on the nitrous while I was waiting for the numbing to set in and had to be thinned out with oxygen. Once they turned the gas down a bit I was fine, but I went for a fine fly there for a bit! Wheee! There was much Novocaine, grinding, and other unpleasantries and after all the fuss was over, it looks for all the world that he just hammered a 2 penny nail into my mouth. The flat metal head is very visible flush against the underside of my gum; the ultimate piercing. For $1,800 I at least should have gotten to choose something pretty to hang off it; something shiny or perhaps some wee fuzzy dice.
Doctor Dentist sent me home with copious amounts of antibiotics which are currently ripping up my tummy and Vicodin which makes me not care about it all that much. I have noticed however, that the pain meds have given me the super power of amazing intelligence. Why just this afternoon I solved a Biblical riddle that has puzzled scholars for decades. I was watching NatGeo and they have a special on Jesus: The Missing Years. We all know about Jesus' birth, and the last couple of years of his life until his crucifixion at age 32, but nothing in between. This special looks at the economic and social conditions of the area where Jesus grew up and speculates about what he was up to during the time that's not documented.
Based on the information that they gave me in the first 5 minutes of the documentary, I figured it out. They said that the only story in the Bible about Jesus between birth and age thirty was about the time Mary and Joseph took him to a nearby city for a religious festival when he was twelve. They get ready to go home and no Jesus. They can't find him for THREE DAYS. When they finally do, he's in the church talking with some scholars.
His mother says something to the effect of 'JESUS CHRIST! Where have you been? We've been looking for your for three days!'
The preteen gives her a little flip answer that went something like 'Duh, Ma! Why didn't you, like, look here in the church first?'
Mystery solved as far as I'm concerned. It's obvious to me that Mary drug his butt back to Nazareth by the ear ranting, "I don't care if you are the son of God , Mister Man! You are grounded 'til you're thirty."
NatGeo could have saved a lot of filming dollars if they'd've come to me first.
In other news, Sweet Willie Brown received his snowman hat
Doctor Dentist sent me home with copious amounts of antibiotics which are currently ripping up my tummy and Vicodin which makes me not care about it all that much. I have noticed however, that the pain meds have given me the super power of amazing intelligence. Why just this afternoon I solved a Biblical riddle that has puzzled scholars for decades. I was watching NatGeo and they have a special on Jesus: The Missing Years. We all know about Jesus' birth, and the last couple of years of his life until his crucifixion at age 32, but nothing in between. This special looks at the economic and social conditions of the area where Jesus grew up and speculates about what he was up to during the time that's not documented.
Based on the information that they gave me in the first 5 minutes of the documentary, I figured it out. They said that the only story in the Bible about Jesus between birth and age thirty was about the time Mary and Joseph took him to a nearby city for a religious festival when he was twelve. They get ready to go home and no Jesus. They can't find him for THREE DAYS. When they finally do, he's in the church talking with some scholars.
His mother says something to the effect of 'JESUS CHRIST! Where have you been? We've been looking for your for three days!'
The preteen gives her a little flip answer that went something like 'Duh, Ma! Why didn't you, like, look here in the church first?'
Mystery solved as far as I'm concerned. It's obvious to me that Mary drug his butt back to Nazareth by the ear ranting, "I don't care if you are the son of God , Mister Man! You are grounded 'til you're thirty."
NatGeo could have saved a lot of filming dollars if they'd've come to me first.
In other news, Sweet Willie Brown received his snowman hat
Isn't he the cutest Frosty Boy ever!?!?
Have to run. NatGeo has more mysteries for me to solve this afternoon; Amelia Earhart, Big Foot, Alien Abductions. I've got my work cut out for me. Just home the Vicodin doesn't run out!
Comments
For me, Vicodin takes care of the pain for 4-6 hours but makes me sleepy for 12-18. I'm not worth much when I'm taking it.