Molly Bee On The Rocks
I started off this beautiful Monday in my bathrobe and slippers, face down in the shrubbery outside. ‘Molly Bee’, you comment…’Isn’t that how you start most days?’ Yes! Normally I start off my day face down in the metaphorical bushes…not the actual ones planted in the rocks outside my patio. I went to let Ben out at 6:30. He was on his retractable leash. He usually goes out, does his business, and then comes back in since he knows breakfast is next and it’s his most important meal of the day; right up there with his supper. The boy does love him some kibble. He also loves him some squirrels. Sheldon/Sheldonina was in the big tree out front and I didn’t see him/her. The big tree is approximately two feet further away from the patio than the retractable leash reaches as it turns out. I, in my usual befuddled morning state, saw him running, but didn’t put two and two together and drop the leash in time. I say, ‘in time’ because once my feet were yanked out from me and I was launched forward onto my front amongst the river rocks, rhododendron and hostas, I dropped it. Might have been due to all of the air being knocked out of me. You tend to drop things when you’re on the verge of unconsciousness. It skittered two feet away and stopped when he did.
I got up and took stock of the situation; the heel of my left hand was hanging in one sheet. I had a puncture wound in my right wrist. Both knees and thighs were scraped and full of holes. I bumped my forehead and chin. Both elbows were bruised. Oy! Good thing I just took that First Aid Class last Thursday! What a way to start another work week! To say that Ben is in the doghouse is an understatement. He knows it too. You should have seen the puppy dog eyes I got when I left without giving him his customary treats as I walked out the door.
On the bright side, it could have been much worse. Last big ‘incident’ with Ben ended up with me having surgery and being in a walking cast for over 6 months. And there is the fact that I FLEW people! For a few glorious seconds, I was soaring through the air with the greatest of ease. Oh the freedom! I just have to work on sticking the landing!
I got up and took stock of the situation; the heel of my left hand was hanging in one sheet. I had a puncture wound in my right wrist. Both knees and thighs were scraped and full of holes. I bumped my forehead and chin. Both elbows were bruised. Oy! Good thing I just took that First Aid Class last Thursday! What a way to start another work week! To say that Ben is in the doghouse is an understatement. He knows it too. You should have seen the puppy dog eyes I got when I left without giving him his customary treats as I walked out the door.
On the bright side, it could have been much worse. Last big ‘incident’ with Ben ended up with me having surgery and being in a walking cast for over 6 months. And there is the fact that I FLEW people! For a few glorious seconds, I was soaring through the air with the greatest of ease. Oh the freedom! I just have to work on sticking the landing!
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So today I had this lightheaded feeling in the bathroom (a one seater, so the outside door is locked). And I thought, huh, what if a person (ME?) were to fall and crack their head on the toilet. How would anybody get into the bathroom, when I AM THE ONLY PERSON WHO KNOWS WHERE THE EMERGENCY KEYS ARE. So I asked the intern who sits near there what he'd do if he heard a crash, etc, and eventually (after talk about TALKING through the door) he said he'd look for the key above the door. Little would he know that it would be in an envelope, in the back of a binder, on a shelf with lots of similar binders, inside of a cabinet in my office. NOW, however, there are keys taped to the door frames of each bathroom, and by the first aid kit, and in my office. The boss said, so you'd lay there for a few hours while we figured it out, what could happen? I said, bleed to death because I cracked my head on the toilet??
Get better soon, and I will too.