Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Rodent Revolt


Based on my recent experiments here in The Ark, all rodents like to rearrange furniture and do housekeeping during the wee hours of the morning. Sneakers-the-Bunny has always enjoyed making thumping noises about 2 AM by gleefully picking up her litter box and dropping it repeatedly. Enter Flake, Rosebud, and Key, our three new gerbil friends. Two of them bumped their respective houses around the fish tanks all night while the other one ran hot laps on her squeaky wheel. It went something like this:
Sneakers: THUMP!
Gerbil 1: bumpbumpbump
Gerbil 2: bumpbumpbumpbumpbumpumpbumpbumpbumpbump
Sneakers: THUMP!!!! THUMP!!!!!
Gerbil 3: squeeaaaaky squeeaaaaky squeeaaaaky squeeaaaaky
Sneakers: THUMP! (Always has to have the final word!)
Repeat ad nauseum throughout the night.

I laid there for quite a while trying to figure out if they had devised some kind of rodent Morse Code and were talking to each other:

Sneakers: Get used to the kisses and cuddles. I’ve been captive for over three years and she never lets up. Just go limp. That’s what I do. It’s your only hope.
Gerbil (probably Flake since she’s the uppity one): No way! I'll go all Ninja on her butt! I’m getting out, I tell ya and I’ll spring all of youz too! Once we're out, meet me in that old van down by the river! I've got enough gas money to get us to Rio!

Or just some bizarre plot hatched to finally push me over the razor-thin edge I’ve been delicately teetering on for some time now. (Reading over what I’ve already written, I suspect the latter and that it’s worked).

Tonight I will be setting the four of them down and explaining how cold the Wisconsin nights get this time of year. If they would like to experience just how cold…keep it up! Then they can all spend the night out on the deck. They’d probably like that…just one step closer to Rio.

1 comment:

Elizabeth said...

I think you need to send 'em to Boscobel to the Supermax. They can try to tap out messages on the pipes. That'll teach 'em to keep you up all night.