Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Has Anyone Got A Light? It's Kinda Dark In Here!

My brand, new car, Preston, has 780 miles on him. I know it flies in the face of convention to give a car a male name but y’all know me, I FLIES IN CONVENTION’S BIG OL’ FAT FACE ALLA TIME! Take THAT convention, I say! Ahem…anyway. Preston. 780 miles. Just a baby, really, and I’ve already crunched him. I am not a responsible car Mommie apparently. I had a fender bender in the gas station parking lot last Friday evening. Crap. Yet another thing that ain’t goin’ my way these days.

It wasn’t my fault and it didn’t do major damage but Geez Louise, will someone please get me out of this G***D*** whale! It smells really fishy in here, I have a shrimp allergy and Jonah's constant humming is really working on my last nerve.

Anyway, I go to the auto place today for an estimate. My insurance company set up the appointment for me. I check in with the receptionist. Pretty soon ‘the guy’ comes out with his clipboard of doom and gloom. I’m the only one in the miniscule ‘waiting area’. He looks right at me and says “Scott?” (We’re still on the same policy because it’s paid through January). So I say, ‘Well, yes, before the operation… It’s Molly Bee now. " Thankfully he caught on that it was a joke and started laughing because the estimate process included taking lots of photos of Preston and I can just imagine a few sneaky ones of me making the rounds in the garage after I left. “Yeah!!! Lady used to be a DUDE! No! Really! She told me! "

Preston’s owie will take 3 days to fix. I still don’t have the numbers yet, but it has to be significantly lower than the $2,033 estimate one of the BIG dealerships gave me. Especially since I suspect I could fix it myself with a rubber hammer and some rubbing compound, or WD40 and Duct Tape-whatever'll git ‘er done. Unfortunately it’s a dark gray car and what little light Jonah and I get from the whale’s blowhole is weak and intermittent at best. It’s really not conducive to doing my best work so I’ll leave it to ‘the guy’. Hmmm. I could probably still use the rubber hammer if someone would be so kind as to send one. It may solve my problem with the constant humming. Just sayin'. So please take a minute on September 10th, 11th and 12th and send healing thoughts Preston’s way as he goes to the car hospital for an owie-ectomy. I’m sure he’ll be much braver than all of those cars with girly names, but he can use all the help he can get.

9 comments:

DPUTiger said...

Here's hoping that the insurance thing is quick and easy and that Preston flies through is owie-fix with flying colors! :)

YarnThrower said...

Total bummer.

You crack me up, though!

Mum said...

I've often wondered what it looked like inside that whale!!!

Cindy G said...

Awwww, sending some Preston love.

knitnzu said...

Poor poor Preston! Sometimes w/ the bumper thingies, they have to replace the whole bumper, and sometimes that bumper comes to them unpainted, so it then has to go to a body shop. I know. Had to replace mine TWICE in about 6 months. First was somebody ripping it off by mistake at the parking lot at the beach. She was all sorts of upset that I was upset, but I kept telling her, it's no big deal, nobody got hurt, her insurance will pay, yada yada yada. THEN that winter, dh took my AWD car to drop kiddo off, pulls in the drive, going about 0.5 miles per hour, and taps the end of a RR tie. And totally cracks the bumper. Worse than before. We paid out of pocket for that one. But not at the dealer, it was some $200 cheaper at the body shop. (Scott! how funny!)

Kitty Mommy said...

Big sloppy kisses for poor Preston's boo-boo!

dale-harriet said...

"....before the operation"...Mollybee, you are probably the quickest wit in the west. Who knew? Oh, you're all sweet-faced, sparkly-eyed knitterly type on first glance - but you're for sure One of US curmudgeonly old broads underneath. Preston will be fine - you don't ascribe to the "keying my own new car in a subtle place so the acne-faced teen-ager down the road doesn't smack it with his bicycle" school of thought? In the fine old Yiddish tradition, I say to you "May this be the WORST problem to befall Preston!"

MadCityMike said...

Good vibes being sent your way Molly Bee!

Michelle at Boulderneigh said...

I'm catching up on my blog reading now that we're back from a trip. I'm not a funny person during the best of times; your sense of humor during your "worst of times" is amazing to me. I'm sure you don't feel like laughing, still you bless us with a chuckle. Thank-you. And be patient, that big fish is going to barf you up sometime!