The Adventures of Molly Bee and The Thunder King

Today is a weird day at work. All the schools are closed because of the -40° wind chill factor potential and the ice-covered roads from yesterday's storm. Usually when the city school closes, we close. Today however, we are on a 'two hour delay' which has got everyone confused and in a tizzy. Half my kids are out or coming in late. Half of them are supposed to be in a workshop and the other half on the phone. Now it's questionable as to whether we have enough phone coverage... Oh the angst! On and on and on they go. In the midst of the tumult, one of my kids asked me to make coffee. "All hands were on the phones so no one can brew it." They must have been desperate to ask me so, this one time, I said, "Sure! I'll make it".

When THEY make the coffee, they grind their own beans and make a brew called "Black Thunder" . They put in twice the coffee and half the water . The resulting sludge looks, and I suspect tastes, like used 40W motor oil. They are very proud of this fact and swill it all day. Explains a lot. I rummaged around in the drawer and found a sample package of Folger's Vanilla Biscotti, which is what I drink at home sometimes. I put the filter and coffee in and then looked over the more-difficult-than-it-has-to-be-possibly-alien-technology that is the new coffee maker. No indication of how much water to put in anywhere.No measuring device on the pot. No measuring lines in the pot. So I went to one of my kids, who is also one of the head Black Thunder makers, and asked him how to tell how much water goes in. He wanders over to the aforementioned machine. You know, the same one he couldn't go over to a minute ago to actually make a pot, stops short when he sees the froufrou coffee in the filter, sniffs it and says:

THUNDER KING: Uh...yeah...did you smell this?
ME: Yeah! (Enthusiastically) Vanilla Biscotti! My favorite!
THUNDER KING: Uh...yeah...the coffee drinkers in the department usually drink this.
(Points to the clearly marked bag of sludge-making Black Thunder on the coffee table.
ME: I know, but that's gross.
THUNDER KING: No it's not. It's what we drink.
(Tentatively poking at coffee filter and making motions like he's going to remove and dump the Vanilla Biscotti, yet eyeing me to see what I'm going to do if he does. )
ME: It's not what I drink.
THUNDER KING: (Stunned silence. Crickets chirping. Then...) Buuuuuuuutttttt.....
ME: Buuuuuuuutttttt..... I'm. making. the. coffee. (Emphatically!)
THUNDER KING: Uh...yeah...yeah...OK. Pour the water in here to just below the holes that hold the lid on and will make water spill all over the table.
[He knows this, not because he's read the instruction manual (which I rescued from the garbage that first day but has since disappeared) or because he is a scientist and has used visual information to assess it. He knows this because, to date, he has personally poured about 7 pots of water and or coffee all over the table and floor. He's one of those 'must learn by experimenting' kinda scientists.]

Anyway, guess those assertiveness training seminars are working after all. He backed right off. So I filled the department will the comforting smell of Folger's Vanilla Biscotti. I even tried a small amount, but it was awful due to the fact that pot after pot of Black Thunder has been brewed in the months we've had the machine and they have NEVER CLEANED IT. So I dumped it out and got a cup from the vending machine like I always do. The coffee in there's not great but at least the guy comes and cleans the machine once a week. And I just sat back and enjoyed the wafting vanilla scent and the gnashing of teeth I heard over my cubie wall from all of the Black Thunder drinkers who were discovering the pleasure of Folger's for themselves. But they're drinking it. And I'll bet they don't ask me again. Heh Heh Heh! I like to make my own entertainment. It's the little things!

Later:

Look! Laura over at Pickin' and Throwin' honored me with this award! What a sweetie! Her blog makes my day too! Thanks Laura!

Here are the award instructions...

"Give the award to 10 people whose blogs bring you happiness and inspiration and make you feel happy about blogland. Let them know by posting a comment on their blog so they can pass it on. Beware you may get the award several times."

Ooo! There are so many! There are some that Laura already chose, Elizabeth, Cindy, and Sus as well as Dale-Harriet, Beth and Peaknits . They are all 'local bloggers'. Then there's Lisa and Mel out in Maine. And Dave in Boston. And Brooke in Ohio. And the list wouldn't be complete without Franklin just south of here in Chicago. Here's to you, Gang! You are a constant source of inspiration and make my day!